Kirsty

I dont know if I can do this....

I dont know if I can do this....
We’ll there I am out at sea alone in a Kayak thinking ‘what the hell was I thinking’ and ‘now would be a good time to have a strong fit boyfriend’ as everyone else paddles effortlessly in their 2 man kayaks and I struggle against the waves solo, the little annoying voice entered my head. It said ‘give up! and just sit here and float’ the only problem with that was I would have been swept out to sea, not into shore. By this stage we had been gone all of 20 minutes and my hands and arms were throbbing...pathetic I know. It seemed every time I stopped to have a rest I undid all the ground I had covered. I was angry with the ocean ‘how could it do this to me’ didn’t I deserve a little help? Some nice waves pushing me a long in the right direction. Clearly not. So I struggled on and reminded myself that I had overcome this little voice before and I had inner strength in reserves somewhere.

 I just had to tap into it and distract myself from the pain, to stop being a baby and get over myself. It was about this time I thought of Justin Jones & James Castrission speaking colleagues who had Kayaked from Australia to new Zealand for 62 days. I had new found respect for them, as until you have been in a Kayak you don’t really get it.
 
So I am sitting there paddling with all my might (which was probably wasn’t much) and thinking if they can do it so can I. When we finally land on the island I am relieved and when we eventually return for the day (it has only been 2 hours) I am elated. Not only because it’s over but because once again I had that lovely happy feeling you get when you do something for the first time, that you didn’t know you could do but inevitably we are always capable of more than we know. You know that feeling it’s the one you get when you build Ikea furniture. I hope this year is full of new experiences that push you out of your comfort zones and give you that happy feeling.